Moments with You

Zephaniah,  there are so many little things that I want to remember forever about being pregnant with you. Like how on the drive to our ultrasound the oatmeal bear paw I was going to eat was too sweet and made me feel more sick. And that I always wanted to eat, but never knew what I wanted. Or if I did know it was never something we had. I bought random snacks just so I'd have more choices since so often things just didn't sound good. I had a lot of strawberry kiwi frozen fruit bars, something actually healthy and that I wanted to eat. You and I had a lot of naps together, some days I'd even let Jotham and Julia watch a video just so I could nap, I was always so tired.  I thought I felt you moving so many times, but it was probably just my imagination cause you were so small (and after you were gone I'd still get those feelings much too often). I started watching Alias during our naps, something I could sleep through since I'd seen it before. We went swimming with Grandma and Grandpa when they visited and to the park. We went to Minot and went on the water slides there. I hoped to buy maternity clothes on that trip but couldn't find any. I made sure to wear a cute maternity top on Jotham's birthday, the brown one, its one of my favourite tops. We took Jotham trick or treating to the mall, and the brown corduroy jacket I was wearing was getting really snug and I was certain I wouldn't be wearing it much longer,  (but I wore it all winter).  I loved wearing my maternity clothes, I didn't expect to need them so soon, but I was so much more comfortable in them. You even went on four airplanes, two each way on our trip to BC for Lindsay's wedding. I was so excited to see how Jotham would learn to play with you and help us with you. I spent lots of time looking at new beds for Jotham and deciding if it would be best to get bunk beds so you could share one day, or get him a mates bed that had drawers in since you would get the dresser. I picked out a swaddling blanket I wanted to get for you since the ones I had would be too hot for summer, it was white muslin with blue stars (from Aden and Anais). I almost ordered a "Future Canucks Fan" maternity shirt for myself for Christmas, but was unsure what size to get. So many moments that you created for us in the short time we had you. Wish we were creating more memories with you now. I love you so much, and I miss you everyday.